just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
Randomize