why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Just found a uh poem I wrote on ambien. It says to "cry your seamen filled tears" and "I hope you take a dagger to your vagina" and at the end it says "sincerely, God". What.the.fuck do they put in that pill?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
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