You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
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