yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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