i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
well I can't set my house on fire every night
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
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