So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
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