we're blogging at a bar
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
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