Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
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