Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
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