HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
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