I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
Randomize