If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
Drunk walkin through police station. America
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
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