My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
Randomize