Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
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