Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
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