Will you blow on my dice?
My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
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