she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we're making bets on your personal life
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
Randomize