But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
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