I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
Randomize