i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
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