my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
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