You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
Randomize