Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
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i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
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Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
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