Texts From Last Night

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  (712): View more from Iowa

  I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.

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  (712): I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well. http://tfl.nu/yae3
  Replies (2) Good night (1983) Bad night (660) Order T-Shirt
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  (740): View more from Ohio

  he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?

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  (740): he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine? http://tfl.nu/es01
  Replies (42) Good night (1113) Bad night (4008) Order T-Shirt
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  (425): View more from Washington

  the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side

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  (425): the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side http://tfl.nu/wowf
  Replies (27) Good night (5395) Bad night (704) Order T-Shirt
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  (478): View more from Georgia

  you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.

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  (478): you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome. http://tfl.nu/9omq
  Replies (12) Good night (6616) Bad night (514) Order T-Shirt
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.

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  (609): I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old. http://tfl.nu/3g8e
  Replies (22) Good night (4937) Bad night (799)
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  (714): View more from California

  Who was that guy you went home with?

  (1-714): View more from California

  Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.

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  (714): Who was that guy you went home with? (1-714): Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now. http://tfl.nu/q2tl
  Replies (45) Good night (6438) Bad night (1177) Order T-Shirt
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  (815): View more from Illinois

  Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye

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  (815): Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye http://tfl.nu/ds98
  Replies (12) Good night (1116) Bad night (2628) Order T-Shirt
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  (904): View more from Florida

  now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.

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  (904): now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis. http://tfl.nu/g1kt
  Replies (9) Good night (1288) Bad night (2257) Order T-Shirt
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  (209): View more from California

  come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground

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  (209): come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground http://tfl.nu/qcj8
  Replies (13) Good night (731) Bad night (2203) Order T-Shirt
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  (601): View more from Mississippi

  It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.

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  (601): It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face. http://tfl.nu/wypl
  Replies (9) Good night (3011) Bad night (595) Order T-Shirt
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area

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  (508): Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area http://tfl.nu/7yxw
  Replies (3) Good night (989) Bad night (283) Order T-Shirt
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  (801): View more from Utah

  New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.

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  (801): New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes. http://tfl.nu/3a1v
  Replies (5) Good night (1164) Bad night (350) Order T-Shirt
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.

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  (248): We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land. http://tfl.nu/euer
  Replies (6) Good night (1652) Bad night (371) Order T-Shirt
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.

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  (330): Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success. http://tfl.nu/8tcw
  Replies (2) Good night (782) Bad night (243) Order T-Shirt
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  (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  Cockoligist

  (587): View more from Alberta

  Yes, one may refer to me as that.

  (587): View more from Alberta

  I should make business cards.

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  (780): Cockoligist (587): Yes, one may refer to me as that. (587): I should make business cards. http://tfl.nu/nsw3
  Replies (8) Good night (643) Bad night (230)

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