we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
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