Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
Edward fifth and chaser hands
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
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