I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
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I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
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Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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