ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
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