is your mom at the bar?
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
it was like his penis was on wheels.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize