was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
Randomize