So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
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You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
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I need water and some morals
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
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