Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
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