new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
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