I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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