The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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