fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
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Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
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