Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
Randomize