i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
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