It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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