What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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