Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
Randomize