I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just blew my weed a kiss
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
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