so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Randomize