I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
That awkward moment when you were so fucking drunk lastnight that you and your fuck buddy wake up wearing eachother's clothing covered in hot cheetos with his cat curled up between your heads meowing. Thought you'd appreciate this moment with me.
Randomize