Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
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