I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Randomize