You're completely useless in the revolution.
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
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