i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
Randomize