Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
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