I feel like death. Did you die last night?
Nope. Ready for round 2. Fiesta!
unreal. Greatest comeback since Jesus
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
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